Here is my latest draft.
snowdrift about page 3rd draft.odt (22.3 KB)
Apologies that it took so long. I struggled with implementing a lot of the feedback (all of which I agree with principally) in a way that retained concision. And I’m still struggling in that regard with the first section (which is now focused on introducing public goods). @wolftune and I discussed above how best to implement the discussion in Framing idea for introducing newcomers to concept of public goods, and even the relatively stripped down outline I suggested then seems too wordy in practice. The draft I’m posting here is still pretty wordy, and I’m looking for feedback as far as where I should cut it down (if at all). My immediate leaning would be to either try to synthesize the NPR/public radio example down to an inevitably reductive, but concise, sentence or two; or perhaps I could just omit that example entirely, and replace it with a “for more complex examples click here” hyperlink.
I could probably also trim the first paragraph, but I want to avoid just dropping “non-exclusive” and “non-rivalrous” without explaining effectively what that means. Do you all think I need to include the more elaborate examples following: “Public goods are commodities or services that are non-exclusive, meaning freely available to all, and non-rivalrous, meaning they don’t diminish in supply when they’re used.”? Or is that sentence sufficient?
It’s hard because I do feel that all of the information in this section is useful, but I think as is it’s far too intimidating a block of text to greet people with, especially before we’ve even introduced crowdmatching.
As far as the other sections go I’m just looking for any general feedback, copy edits, suggestions, reactions, etc.
I haven’t made it to many co-working sessions lately, but I will aim to hang around after the meeting wednesday, and maybe also the thursday coworking if anyone wants to chat about it there.